I almost had a cow last night...

Well, not me, exactly, but my Jersey, Sassy who is just past nine months pregnant.  And it wouldn't have been a full grown cow, of course, but a very little one.  Conventional wisdom from my vet says a Jersey's gestation runs 9 months plus 10 days (give or take a week--don't you love how precise farming is).  That would put her due date anytime between yesterday and sometime next week.

So when I checked her last night and saw the signs--a swelling udder, softening tail bones and a far off look in her eyes, I began to get hopeful.  I moved the pesky donkeys to a different paddock, fluffed up some extra bedding where Sassy would sleep and went to bed.  At 3:30 (that's A.M.) I got up to check on her because I am a careful (read: soft-hearted) farmer and I wanted to make sure everything was proceeding well.  Sassy was laying down, chewing her cud, with her back legs sticking out straight.  Her breathing was coming in short, measured grunts and every few minutes she would stretch, arch her tail bone a little further, give a big push and her back end would swell and extend a few inches--everything you expect to see when a soon to be cow-mom is working to expel 30 0r 40 pounds of calf through an impossibly small opening.

These things can take time, I know, and I'm not really worried about Sassy's birthing or mothering abilities.  So after watching for a few minutes I returned to bed and woke up my wife to tell her nothing had happened.

I went back out to the barn at 6 this morning, fully expecting to find a baby cow and hoping for a baby girl.  But Sassy seemed to have thought better of the whole idea.  She was just standing around waiting to get her neck scratched and her feed bunk filled.

She didn't fool me for a minute, however.  I know what's coming; I'll just have to be patient.  Patient-- and hopeful that she doesn't get the lame brained idea of having her calf out in a snow bank at the far end of the pasture in the rain this weekend.

Patience and Hope.  The farmer's job description.